Welcome back to my blog, today we will discuss the comparison and social media.
As a 30-year-old woman, I can say that I have grown tremendously and that I have learned a lot about how to live life better. However, I am only human and I am not always perfect. I don’t always do what I preach! I tend to think with my emotions in some circumstances when I feel like I’m under pressure. Ha, I just thought to the Queen and David Bowie song, “Under pressure”.
Anyways, back to what I was saying! With this imperfection, I also tend to fall victim to the comparison mentality. As I mentioned above, I just turned 30 in February and there is definitely this societal pressure to get married, have babies and live this perfect life by the age of 30. I mean, isn’t that what social media portrays? The highlight reel of people’s lives making us think they have it together and live these amazing lives. Behind the scenes, there is so much going on, even for myself. If you were to look at my personal Instagram feed, you would think I am always happy, but I do have my struggles. I just choose to not post it online because I am a private person and people do not need to know your personal business.
Comparison has become toxic, the younger generations, especially generation Z has fallen victim to the comparison mentality. People have become very vain and feel the need to show off their materialistic possessions. It has turned into a competition of who is living their best life. If you were confident with your life you wouldn’t feel the need to prove anything to anyone. There were moments when I felt stressed and pressured to dive into comparison thinking. It is toxic, it makes you think your life is not the best it can be and it makes you feel like a failure.
“Oh, I am not married yet”.
“I am getting older, when will I have children. There is no time.”
“I haven’t even purchased my first home.”
“I don’t travel all the time, am I not accomplished?”
“I don’t have as many likes or followers as that person.”
“Wow, this person has the job they want, and I am not even close. I failed.”
Have you ever asked yourself these questions, wondering and basing your worth on external factors? Some of you reading this are saying yes, and maybe you feel ashamed to admit to this. It’s okay, we are not perfect and to be honest I have thought these thoughts above frequently. It’s very easy to get into the habit of self-defeating thoughts and to get out of this mindset it is extremely challenging. What I’ve noticed is when you focus on how green the grass is on the other side, we lose sight of what we need to accomplish. We wallow in our own misery and forget to focus on our goals. The things we wish to accomplish in life will not happen if we spend time looking at how accomplished other people may be. I was going to publish this post earlier but I read some positive new that I wanted to share. Instagram is doing a test where they will remove likes, and you will not be able to see them anymore. This is primarily done to see if this will have positive effects on people’s mental health. This is a step towards the right direction that will help people see their worth and stop comparing. I couldn’t be happier about this social media change and I hope it is here to stay.
One of the things that’s helped me divert my thinking from this toxic mindset is my faith. I am Christian and this may not work for everyone because not everyone follows a religion. However, in Christianity, it is said that God has a plan for you and the wrong things should not be forced. If something is not meant for you it will crumble very easily right before your eyes. My greatest goal in life is to find a career that makes me happy and so far nothing has worked out. Do I get frustrated, oh boy, yes I do. Very much so. But I believe something great is in store for me and I cannot force things to happen. I can hustle and try my best but in the end, what’s meant to happen, will. Maybe the timing isn’t right!
Do not rush things in your life, if you stress out and compare yourself to others you will miss out on living in the present moment. You will forget to live this one life you’ve got because you are caught up in this negative web. I don’t know about you but I don’t want to live my life this way anymore. No, I don’t, so I have made very conscious efforts to change my mindset and for the past year I have made major progress. I hope whoever is reading this will do the same, please do not waste your life away looking at what other people do. It’s not worth it! Your time will come, trust me! I believe it for myself and I do for whoever is reading this.
Thank you for reading and I hope some of you felt inspired to make a change!
See you again soon with another post!